Insanity is knowing that what you are doing is completely idiotic, but still, somehow, you just can't stop it ~ Elizabeth Wurtzel
Perhaps I have crossed that line between sanity and insanity... (though I am not yet fully mad but perhaps the weak bars that were caging and housing my streak of madness are now down...leaving my madness open, free... unleashed) and I now fear myself... afraid of my impulse, ... of my next step what could that be?
My ears hear the ringing... A ferocious storm ravaging everything inside me.
Vulnerable, unsuitable.... Was I not yet ready to take the journey? into this world?
I am not sure if I have always been like this from the beginning or became one on the way of growing up ~ a mess of power(ful or less) emotions.....
The innocence I once had, the inner peace I could once feel or the ready smile I could summon in me at any time, I no more find, my cheerfulness I have lost in oblivion...
That joy in simple things, I am not able to feel from within... Have I lost my sensory neurons? I once could embrace life like a bosom friend... but it was long back. Is it that I have lost the ME somewhere behind on the way?
Like a time bomb ticking in me...just waiting to explode. Is it anger? or anguish? I really don't know...
I have somehow distorted the Me I once used to be, and now I am not able to rebuild the Me...when came the rude awakening ... that my Guardian Angel is leaving me... forever...whom I wanted to cling onto forever.
